All I want for Christmas...

...is a full head of hair! But we are making progress!!!! Check it out...














Wishing everyone a very Merry Christmas and a healthy New Year. We have much to be grateful for. Let's not mess it up...

xoxo

5:00 Shadow

That's about the most fitting description of Nancy's hair right now. Traditionally, "a five o'clock shadow is beard growth visible late in the day on a man whose face was clean-shaven in the morning. The term comes from the traditional nine-to-five workday hours."

So maybe this would be better termed a "6 month shadow." Whatever we decide to call it, the good news is that it is real hair, very short, very soft but hair nonetheless. She is certainly making progress in that area. I am trying to get a picture posted here but that may be a bit tough. She's very protective on certain things....

Not much else to report. The neuropathy is still as bad as ever and we met with the pain team yesterday. They are going to try a different approach as the Lyrica doesn't seem to be doing much. So we'll give this new approach a month and see if she gets any relief.

During our visit to Cedars yesterday, we always like to stop by the infusion center to see the nurses. They like it when patients stop by so they can see them when they are mending as well. It does their hearts a lot of good to see the positive results sometimes.

Yesterday we ran into someone at the infusion center that I have seen around here and there. We sort of looked at each other like I know I know you. Once we got past the obligatory pleasantries, Nanc and I found out that his wife is back for her second round. Not second round as in second round of her current treatment. She's back for her first treatment of her second time around, as in her cancer has come back.

Nanc doesn't like talking about it but it is a realty. My heart just about broke watching them as she was going to get weighed in, knowing what was in store. You could sense the dread in her steps.

Once she heard that, we were out of there in a flash.

xoxo

So why so few posts lately?

I'm not sure if it's out of guilt or not, but I feel like I owe everyone an explanation as to why the frequency of the posts has slowed considerably since Nanc's treatments were done. You may not feel like you need one but I feel like I need to give you one anyway...

In a nutshell, it's because it's all about the recovery process now and like I told you last time - it's similar to watching grass grow. To say that Nanc gets frustrated with her progress would be an understatement...

So - rather than run the risk of being majorly redundant, I am waiting until we have some real news to report. That plus I am trying to get caught up at work...

xoxo

It's Official - We have Peach Fuzz!

I verified that fact last night. And it didn't require a magnifying glass either ;-)

It's coming in very evenly, very light in color right now and peach fuzz is just about the best phrase to describe how it feels. Her eyebrows are beginning to come back and a few small eyelashes were spotted as well making their appearance. You could almost hear Stravinskiy's Rite of Spring in the background....

And Erin Carr - thanks for posting a couple of weeks ago. It's good to know you're doing well. Erin was one of Nancy's angels at Cedars who is now doing a stint at John's Hopkins. Click here to see her picture in case you don't remember her.

I really which that there was more to report after such a long absence but this part of her recovery is like watching grass grow sometimes. Each day seems to bring very small advances overall. she is still experiencing pretty bad neuropathy and fatigue. It's funny how you get used to taking 2 hours to just eat and shower in the morning but that's what it's like these days. With little or no feeling in her hands, be careful if you sit next to her while she's eating. You just never know when her fork might just fall out of her hand. We are staying away from soup for the time being.

So, that's all the news that's fit to print. Say a prayer if you think of it for all cancer patients who may be struggling with their disease...

xoxo

One Small Step for Nancy...

...one giant leap for her recovery. (I don't know. Maybe a bit corny. Maybe change it later before you publish it.)

So on my way home, in the middle of what seems to be coming a regular 90+ minute commute and an endless stream of Springsteen on my iPod, Nanc reported feeling "peppy." Now that's a new one. I can't remember her ever using the word peppy before. But hey, I am certainly not going to argue over the word choice. I'm tickled pink that she's "peppy." That means she's making progress.

You can hear it in her voice.

So, it may be a little thing, but it's pretty huge if you think about it a bit and put it into perspective over the last 5 months. She certainly wasn't feeling any too peppy back in the middle of July...

xoxo

A New Normal

I know, I know, it's been a while. Consider it a good thing, generally speaking. For me, I have been trying like mad to get caught up at work so I have not had too much time to sit and type. For Nanc, she thinks she should be feeling better by now at 4 weeks since her last treatment.

So what about this "new normal" thing? I heard it said that living with cancer, no matter where you are with it in terms of your treatment, your recovery, your whatever, you have to get used to the devil sitting on your shoulder - you have to make friends with it...

I'll let that sink in for a minute - I had to think about it for a while when I first heard it.

Right now, Nancy's biggest battle is with the fatigue and the neuropathy. So what exactly is peripheral neuropathy?

"Peripheral neuropathy describes damage to the peripheral nervous system, the vast communications network that transmits information from the brain and spinal cord (the central nervous system) to every other part of the body. Peripheral nerves also send sensory information back to the brain and spinal cord, such as a message that the feet are cold or a finger is burned. Damage to the peripheral nervous system interferes with these vital connections. Like static on a telephone line, peripheral neuropathy distorts and sometimes interrupts messages between the brain and the rest of the body.

"Because every peripheral nerve has a highly specialized function in a specific part of the body, a wide array of symptoms can occur when nerves are damaged. Some people may experience temporary numbness, tingling, and pricking sensations (paresthesia), sensitivity to touch, or muscle weakness."

I think I've mentioned a couple of times before that Nanc has been experiencing this for quite some time. Sometimes she can't even pet the dogs because it feels so weird. The difference is that now it seems to have rocketed to some new dimension that makes it difficult to button shirts, put on a necklace or stand in one place without wobbling. Try walking without any feeling in your toes sometime...

That pretty much describes it. They can't predict when chemo therapy induced neuropathy will reverse itself. the time it takes varies widely from one person to another. So we've been in touch with the pain team in terms of the medication for it and we just doubled her dosage and will see how that goes for now.

And colder weather has a way of magnifying it quite a bit. Sunday was a chilly day by LA standards - maybe 60 - and she was in quite a bit of pain versus a day like today at 85 or so.

And the fatigue. I am almost jealous how she can sleep 12 hours at a clip. I haven't done that since staying up for 2 days straight many, many years ago. But each day lately, it seems to get just a tad better.

So anyway, we had an appointment at Cedars today for her first port flush. You need to access and flush the port so so it doesn't get clogged up. Kind of like an oil change which needs to get done once a month. We stopped by the infusion center and said hi to a few of the nurses. They all commented on how good she looked. So, no matter how she feels, the experts say she is looking very good....

I happen to agree with them.

xoxo

Hair Debate Rages On...

Not that I want to down play the fact that things are changing - don't get me wrong. But Nanc and I seem to completely disagree on exactly how much hair has come back so far. One thing we can certainly agree on however, is the fact that the going is definitely slow. Today is day 19 since her last treatment and the longest she has gone since June without an infusion. So, one would expect things to change, even if just a little.

However, I am just not sensing the same hair growth that Nanc is saying that she feels. Now I am just as much an idealist as the next person and I have admitted that it is softer than it has been since she shaved it. But, (and I know she would tell you differently, but once again I have the keyboard,) it's awfully hard to see...

Hair debate aside, the neuropathy lingers with some small changes. Last night she mentioned that her hands felt better but the feet still hurt quite a bit. That makes her unsteady on her feet and leaves her legs weak. She got down on a knee in the pharmacy the other day and collapsed to both knees and had a hard time getting up. Sure makes shopping a real adventure...

She's been complaining of some pain in her abdomen which from her description is the peritoneal area where they dumped all that chemo - 12 treatments but who's counting? We will watch that closely over the next couple of days and see if it continues. Ipubrofen seems to help - Aleve doesn't touch it.

Anyone want a nearly full bottle of Aleve, cheap??

xoxo